I'm Always Mentally on Vacation

This Is Bad Stuff Kids

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Breakfast in 1938

My grandfather used to insist it would be wise to pepper ones eggs first so that a contrasting background is created to more accurately measure the salt applied.

He always took the second piece of toast in a stack of toast explaining that the top piece had accumulated dust.

I never knew my father’s father. He died in the 1940’s but I remember stories told about him like he is still here.

Clips and Hangers

Have you noticed that if you sufficiently stock a container with paper clips it becomes unnecessary to replenished them ever again.

In 1999 I stocked a pewter dish on my desk with fertile breeder clips and 12 years later they are going strong.

Oh there has been mutations over the years. The clips are now various sizes and colors but still their numbers are strong.

Coat hangers have been known to multiply in much the same way. Again mutations are normal even between plastic and wire hangers.

A Tale of Two Geese

This is Luis Victor Gomez, a Mexican Canada goose. His nickname is “El Defecadora”.

By winter he lives in San Luis Potosí, Mexico at the Golden Crown Paridise Resort where he passes time by crapping on the green on number 17, par 3.

Luis spends his summers in Mint Hill, NC at Pine Lake Country Club where he passes time by crapping on the green of number 16, par 3.

This is Louis Pierre Elliott, a Canadian Canada goose. His nickname is “Le Defecator”.

By summer he spends his time at Club de Golf de l'Ile de Montréal where he passes time crapping on the green at number 14, par 3.

Louis spends his winters in Mint Hill, NC at Pine Lake Country Club where he passes time by crapping on the green of number 16, par 3.

You can see why there is some confusion to the members at Pine Lake, and why they are easily mistaken for each other.

Becoming Elderly

Sunday whipped me. I tailgated with both grills, stove, cooler of oysters and all the trimmings.

But before we dived in the cold quarry in dry suits. Dry suits take a lot of prep time and a lots of additional weight to hold one down.

So put on the underclothes, dry suit, additional weight (20 lbs), tank, gloves, hood, strap it all on and walk to the water and I am already tuckered out.

Then if you notice on the video my yellow mask is fogging and I can’t get it to stop. By the second part of the video I am using a borrowed mask.

Dive for 30 minutes in stressful conditions, then take it all off and cook brats and oysters and by golly I was exhausted.

It was fun, but I am a young elderly person and feel it today.

Winter Diving for a Quarry Cowboy

The tailgate grills are set up and the brats and oysters are cooking.

John stirs some killer chili he made. It was a big hit after the cold quarry dive.

A pan of the idiots like me that showed up on a winter day to dive 42 degree water.

My dive buddy Bruce warms his body with some hot chili. Gotta say this is one tough dude. He dove in a wet suit.

My set up to the right of Bruce before the dive.

Dive Time

LAKE NORMAN, NC - Today is a practice dive for about 6 of us. Operation Grey Goose has been delayed until a later date.

The air temperature will be in the mid 30’s by noon and the water will be warm by comparison at 47. This is a good test to see just how good my dry suit keeps me warm and dry.

The bottom of the quarry is always 47 and the top varies from 47 to near 90 in the summer.

Visibility is supposed to be 30 feet now so I will be shooting video to see how this new camera works underwater.

This is my first dive since November and likely my last until I hit the island in 3 weeks.

21 Sleeps

MIDLAND, NC - Limit up is defined as the maximum amount by which the price of a commodity futures contract may advance in one trading day. Once you reach Limit Up then they shut her down for the day.

My first day on island is limit up already and I am three weeks from going. No way am I going to be able to get her all done.

What put it over the top is my favorite musician on the island is playing 4 to 8 PM at Rainbow Beach. This after waking up for the first day on island, brunch, about three dives and then hours are the best island music?

Tomorrow I am meeting like minded idiots and we plan a dive outing at the rock quarry. It will be in the forties in both water and air temperature. I brought back oysters from the coast to share and other are bring chili and burgers. It should be fun.

A Busy Road Day

SUPPLY, NC - It was one of those long days. An early morning ride to the coast and meetings with a couple of clients.

In return I brought back oysters, collards and turnips from the NC coast. Comfort food for a southern man.

Google latitude kept track of my whereabouts.

All is right in the world

We are in the golden age my friend.

Our Thomas Edison (Steve Jobs) walks among us creating gadgets that change our lives.

The Black Eyed Peas sing Dirty Bits and I tap my foot in joy.

And I find comfort knowing that Cherie Berry has inspected my elevator and I am safe from elevator harm.

All is right in the world.

Two Items for Discussion

MIDLAND, NC - Behold the bounty of the chickens. Two days worth of eggs are here.

Look closely at this picture and you’ll see my fathers hand conveniently located at the end of my left arm. When did I get the hands of an old man?

Fascinating on both accounts.

My Favorite Trees

EAST END, ST CROIX - I had planned another blog topic this morning but after opening my mail this morning I decided to share this sexy specimen of a coconut tree.

This was shot on St Croix last week by a friend. It shows several beautiful coconut trees framing Buck Island which lies 1 mile off shore.

Hey....3 Weeks and Change

MIDLAND, NC - With less than 4 weeks away to winter vacation my thoughts turn to activities I like on the island. I tend not to be a person that sits on a beach but more of one that engages the island in activity. So much so that I wear even myself out sometimes.

And so I have stepped up the daily workouts. Its not easy walking around loaded with an air tank on ones back, or a cooler backpack full of beer hiking to some distant beach.

I have been walking daily to the point where Gigi gave me a grab on the butt cheek and told me I was walking my ass off....literally.

Yesterday I started doing proper form push-ups. Today I feel like I lifted a car yesterday.

It is hard for me not to choreograph my time down there. I want to squeeze as much activity as I can but for others desire their vacation to be about rest, relaxation and spontaneous events.

Rest and relaxation and waiting for a spontaneous event to occur make me nervous.

Sunsets

I love a good sunset or sunrise but the problem is you need a high vantage point or unobstructed view to see the event.

Around here the sun comes and goes but it is filtered through trees or high rise buildings. So in essence all we get is lights on...lights off and the drama of sunset and sunrises are stuff of TV commercials.

I have been walking a lot recently and noticed about a mile from my house on top of a hill overlooking a big corn field is a well manicured and landscaped place by the road with two comfortable Adirondack chairs. The chairs are facing west.

Yesterday at dusk it was warm enough that I saw the couple who lives there sitting in the chairs by the road with a drink and a smile watching the sun set.

I thought that was a great idea. Don’t have an ocean? A corn field on a hill will do.

I Am Not Ashamed

MIDLAND, NC - When I go to San Francisco in March I will be staying here. It is by far my favorite hotel chain.

I have stayed in some mighty fine hotels when someone else is paying. The ones that stand out are The Biltmore, Los Angeles, The Plaza, New York, The St Regis, Dana Point, The Silverado, Napa, Four Seasons, San Diego, La Costa, Carlsbad, and The Montage, Laguna Beach, Green Valley Ranch, Henderson and any Ritz Carlton to name a few. .

I loves me a fancy high end hotel.

The Contrast is Peaking

MIDLAND, NC - 4 weeks from today will be Christmas morning for me. The childlike anticipation culminates with winter vacation to the tropics.

Like last year this winter has been harsh. The snow and ice are still encrusted a week after the storm and the night cold is relentless.

UPS deliveries have gone undelivered and the garbage sits by the curb waiting for last weeks pickup.

I have been daydreaming about diving the clear blue sea and driving among the lush hills of grasses and foliage. I can wait to see brightly colored bougainvillea and hear the warm wind swishing through coconut palm canopies.

The contrast between here and there is at its peak. As best I can tell from afar today it will be 82 degrees, the water is 79.3, the air is windy to gusty, with a 30% chance of a passing shower. The low tonight will be 72.

St Croix is not a bad option to winter.

San Francisco

MIDLAND, NC - I’m going back to San Francisco in March for a brief business trip. Now I can formally embrace my new MLB team the Giants.

Southerners didn’t grow up around baseball. The sport was a sport of big cities and shift workers. No respectful southern town of 100,000 could be expected to fill a 30,000 seat stadium in the middle of a work day.

And so I never learned to appreciate the game. I have been to one MLB game in my life and that was indoors in Toronto.

There is a void in my life after football and baseball could be just the ticket. Beer and hotdogs.

My State?

Dry pork.

I Gotta Get Out of This Place

MIDLAND, NC - Here in Midland we got 5 inches of snow followed by a ¼ glaze of ice and we have yet to get over freezing in 3 days. This is highly unusual for Piedmont North Carolina.

Everything is iced down. All but the main roads are frozen ice. We don’t have a big budget for snow removal down here nor do we have an abundance of equipment to remove snow and ice from the roads.

And so I sit home with Gigi in my PJs showering occasionally waiting for the big thaw.

I’ve been napping too much and eating too much and missing exercise immensely. I took a long walk Saturday before the storm hit but that has been it.

Gigi and I were counting our blessing to day because we have electricity, Internet, heat, water, TV, each other yet we are still bored shitless.

Wednesday will be 31 days until I experience warm weather. I can hardly wait.

The Big Blow of '11

MIDLAND, NC - We received our second snowfall of the winter today. This one was a bit more hazardous than the first so I stayed home. Only the main roads were clear.

Then I thought I’d play with my new video camera I bought for scuba to get used to it. The underwater case should be in this week.

Meanwhile I am impressed with the quality of video for a $117 camera.

This video is available in 720 HD