The Inner Workings of a Mans Mind

Yesterday at some point Gigi told me she had a new vacuum for the guest house.

“Oh good” I said. “I can use it in the RV before I tow it back to Southport.”

My logic was clear. New bagless vacuums always work the best out of the box. It would do a fine job on the deep down dog hair that the RV vacuum missed. Then the RV carpet would be as clean as it could be for our next visit.

“Oh no, you’re not going to use it. That is the guest house vacuum. Use the one in the RV. I told you we needed a new vacuum for the RV.”

By now nature had taken over and the natural defense mechanisms began to unfold. I retreated to that man place that all men know but will not admit like a turtle going into his shell. Her voice was replaced with the famous “Peanuts” muted trumpet sounds like you hear on their TV special when adults speak, and my mind began to wonder.

Did she just tell me that I couldn’t use my own vacuum? What the hell brought that on? I’d sure like to know what synapse or secretion or hormone just went off to cause this in dept discussion about why I can’t use the vacuum that I own at least half of.

I could argue with her but this battle isn’t worth fighting. It is about a friggin vacuum cleaner I think.

Arguing the point is like teaching a cat to whistle. The cat is not going learn to whistle no matter how much I try and eventually it will just piss off the cat.

I snapped back to reality and she is talking about the deficiencies of the RV vacuum and I realize that precious minutes of my life are ticking away talking about a damn vacuum cleaner that I was forbidden to use.

“Okay darling, I’ll use the vacuum in the RV.”

She ceases her discussion. Cease fire. Battle lost I guess.


Anonymous said...

I can solve this. Buy a new vacuum for the RV.

Teresa said...

These are the kind of posts that I like! Getting inside the man's head a little bit...while I understand your point...I must side with's a woman thing.


Reggie Hunnicutt said...

The vacuum works fine. The handle is cracked and has tape around it and the thing that makes it stand up is broken. Her Dad broke that. But it vacuums just fine.

Unknown said...

I have learned (mind you in only 2 short years of marriage) that no battle is worth winning!! Because even if you win, it'll later be held against you, causing you to lose!

Ken said...

Very well thought out Reggie, you win!

TerryC said...

"Her voice was replaced with the famous “Peanuts” muted trumpet sounds like you hear on their TV special when adults speak, and my mind began to wander."

Hahaha! Love it!

I do that ALL THE TIME when Michael talks!! ;)

Ali said...

I get it. Gigi is right. It really is a woman thing.

Good job for just letting it go because you just can't win.

Thank God Chris knows not to bother arguing either, there's no hope of him winning and he knows it.

Chris said...

I think I hear that "Peanuts" voice too.
Ali usually brings me back mid-daydream, though, and still kicks my ass.
Battle lost. Again.

TerryC said...

Did you really call her "Darling", instead of "Buddy"? ;)

Unknown said...

terryc, my wife sometimes calls me "Dude"!

That just doesn't sound right to me!

mr zig said...

perhaps you did win the argument - perhaps in these situations winning is giving in! Cuz it makes life easier, and then you win! hehe -