Historinas Will Call This The Great Feces Crisis of ‘08

Yesterday was the best of times….and it was the worst of times.

Good stuff first. My sister called early and she and Al decided to come up for lunch and to visit at our new place. Etta lives just below Myrtle Beach in the town of Surfside, SC.

The weather here was perfect, warm 82ist, light breeze and puffy clouds.

I stripped down the Jeep bare naked doors and all. Etta and Al arrived and we went for a cruise down to the shore line of Cape Fear. It was wonderful, perfect weather, good friends and a fun ride watching everyone have fun.

Meanwhile….back at the RV the K9’s chitlins were percolating.

We at lunch at an outdoor café and had a special with cucumber salad, boiled shrimp, fries and hush puppies. It was fresh and fantastic. The service was awesome.

We were warned by the waiter not even to make any gesture of giving food to the gulls or we would be swarmed in seconds and covered in gull crap instantaneously. A crap storm was avoided.

We browsed some shops where I found this cool as can be crab claw butane lighter. I don’t smoke but could resist this neat lighter. I first thought I would give it to my cigar smoking brother in law Tom, but I may keep it for myself in the RV to light candles.

We decided to come back to the RV mid afternoon to let out the dogs. We were greeted as we opened the doors to what only can be described at a shit tsunami.

I’m not sure what set it off but all four dogs had the runs. The air was thick with the stench as I screamed at all four to go outside. They looked like sick kids. All four were crimped up with the butt heaves doing the dribble walk. It was nightmarish...like some zombie movie.

Thank God I have a sweet woman that went in and cleaned all that stuff up. She used the new magic pet scent remover and the place looked a good as new.

I am incapable of doing what she did. I would have simple put up a for sale sign and deeply discounted the RV and driven home. You see, if I did what she did I would have to contend with cleaning up vomit as well.

Later I decide to make some preparations for leaving Sunday. I went over to purge the black water tank (sewage). I pulled the stick that release the valve and decide to pull out my golf clubs to take back home. As I pulled the clubs I snapped the shit valve on the RV. Now I’ve got a potential 75 gallon shit problem.

I managed to finish emptying the tank and carefully pushed the valve back in place. Whew! I’m okay for now but this shit valve will have to be fixed on the next trip down.

Oh joy!


Kuckie said...

Sounds like a shitty weekend! ;0)

Anonymous said...

Holy CRAP! What a day!

Ali said...

"All four were crimped up with the butt heaves doing the dribble walk."

Oh my freaking God!!!! Where do you come up with this stuff?!?! I think I just cracked a rib from laughing...

MELackey said...

all I could think to say is "oh, shit..."

Ken said...

Holy.....[you know]!!!!
You know....Shit Happens!

Michael said...

See, shit is unavoidable. You thought you had shit licked with the narrow gull escape, but shit had bigger plans for you.

Reggie Hunnicutt said...

Yes Michael...shit will seek you out.

TerryC said...

Historinas.....are they female Hispanic historians?