Dog Traffic Control

First thing every morning, I am faced with four bladder filled border collies all wanting to relieve them selves.

You see, they don’t have the pleasure as I do of going in the middle of the night and almost falling asleep on the pot as your body rids itself of a source of stress.

--- Just a sidebar here. I sit on the toilet in the middle of the night to relieve myself as do most men if they will admit it. It takes away the aiming problems inherent with being male, limited light, and not wanting to fully wake up. During the light of day, I assume my more traditional male stance. ---

We do not have a fenced yard so I must voice command each dog to keep them from roaming after they go potty.

Usually, Haley, Cedie and Duke go flying out first thing leaving Peaches asleep under my bed. Haley is the best on voice commands. I give her a minute and yell, “That’ll do monkey shine”, and she comes running back.

Okay, one down, two still outside and one yet to go. You see it getting complicated already.

Duke and Cedie are as stubborn as a hair in a biscuit. After a minute Cedie will come hopping in on her three legs. Duke is missing as usual and Peaches presents herself to potty. Out she goes and Cedie comes in. Haley runs out for a moment to survey the situation since she is boss dog. Then Haley runs back in the house.

Okay two in, two out with one MIA. I’ll bet I know where he is.

I pour my coffee, sit down to blog and I hear Peaches knocking at the door. Peaches is so easy.

Peaches comes in and I yell for Duke. That’s three down and one missing.

I put on some shoes and walk to the street where Duke is in the ditch waiting to ambush and dog that might step foot on his property. This activity makes him go doggy deaf.

Doggy deafness is a condition when a dog will not respond to any voice command until their concentration or lack there of is broken. Duke gets doggy deaf a lot.

So old Duke sees me and follows me back to the house.

Now all four are in and safe, and our morning has begun.


Friendly Manitoban said...

Sadie suffers from Doggy Deafness ALL the time.

Anonymous said...

Doggie deafness....selective hearing.... As a man, you can sympathize.

And I guess it's a good thing you didn't elaborate on your throne-sitting experiences while you were on St. Croix.

Reggie Hunnicutt said...

Oh that was terrible!

Peach Pod said...

I love the photo of the dog on the black and white floor. Well done!

Reggie Hunnicutt said...

Thanks but Gigi took that photo.

Amos said...

My golden goes out every morning and just when he thinks I am out of sight, he goes belly up and rolls around in the yard. I yell at him every time and he just ignores me. Then gets up and looks at me like 'I' have a problem. It used to be doggy deaf, now I think it is just plain deaf. He can really only hear clapping now. Poor 12 y.o. pooch.