Freezing in Texas

I’m in this gigantic hotel/resort called the Gaylord. My God it is cold in here. They have gone crazy with the air conditioning.

I swear I could cut glass with my nipples. I’m going to have to bind myself if I can’t find some heat.

So I headed back to the room to draw a quick, hot bath. I didn’t want to get my hair wet; I just wanted to warm up.

I got the water nice and hot and thought I was closing the drain when I got sprayed right on my damn head with blazing hot water. Heck, I still had my clothes on!

So now I’m mad as a wet chicken and still freezing. Where in the heck is the thermostat?


Logzie said...

"I swear I could cut glass with my nipples"

WHERE do you come up with this stuff?? So stinking funny!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Yes! What Logzie said! OMG, you crack me up!

Ali said...

Hahahahahahhahahahaha! Oh man, you kill me Reggie, and never disappoint when I need cheering up!

MELackey said...

Welcome to Texas, Reggie. It's so hot outside, we have a thing with our hotels - the thermostats are always left on "stun". It's the only time you can make frost on the windows without worrying about the electric bill.

If you have free time away from the Gaylord, Bass Pro Shops is just up the road. They even have an indoor firing range. I 99% sure they also rent weapons (since you likely didn't carry your own)

krista said...

LMAO!!! I know how you feel. I hate air conditioning. I was riding in the car yesterday with Ali and Zig and just starting to warm up (I still had my blazer on) and they decided that they needed the air on (they were actually sweating in short sleeves so I guess I'll give them the air).

Reggie Hunnicutt said...

I finally did find the thermostat and now it is a balmy 75 degrees in here. And I figured how to stopper the tub too after taking a shower with water up to my calves.

I saw the Bass Pro shop on the way in. Thanks for the tip. You are right, I'm not packing heat on this trip although Texas would understand why a man needs to carry.