Chasing the DDT Truck

It’s a Wonder I’m Still Alive......

DDT is a synthetic pesticide that was used, or I should say, overused in the 1950’s and 60’s. DDT is still the most effective way to control mosquitoes today, yet its use is banned in most countries.

Millions of lives could be saved from malaria in underdeveloped countries if the use of DDT resumed. Like its overuse, DDT is far under used today.

When I was a child the city would come around and spray DDT to control mosquitoes. The truck usually came out at dusk, and it had a peculiar sounding pump that sprayed a gigantic fog of DDT all over the neighborhood.

We would get on our bicycles and chase the truck joyously laughing and breathing in the pesticide. After all, surely adults wouldn’t spay a hazardous material on innocent children.

Blogger Stuff

I write stuff for my blog in Word, because I can’t spell worth a darn. Word also catches huge snafus in sentence structure. I never was too good in English class. I cringe now when I think about Ali and Alyssa reading my words with the misplaced structure and punctuation.

I keep the writings for a few months in a giant document before I delete the file and start anew.

I notice that if I write an entry that I must write it completely and post it immediately or I will abandon it forever. I’ll bet 25% of the stuff I write never gets posted because I didn’t finish the comment and lost interest.

How ADD is that?

Oh, I found a lazy man shortcut for logging onto blogger. You know how you get the “splash” page asking you to logon? This would require many keystrokes and the use of the tab button and mouse to put in your username and password. Just leave it blank and hit enter. You’ll be presented with another login page that remembers your username and password. Now just mouse over and the username and password enter for you. Hit enter and you are on your way. Minimal effort!

One year ago today........

Mr. Duke

As anyone who knows us, you might say we like dogs. Hell, we like animals. We love them.

Old Duke was rescued from the pound on Halloween 2006. So far Duke has been a perfect gentleman, except for a few shit walking incidents in the living room. I mean, who hasn’t done that a time or two in your life? I can hear Diesel, Goliath, and Sadie saying, “Here, here”, in agreement like they do in Parliament.

Most rescue dogs are so polite and grateful to have a new home. The honeymoon with Duke continues except, he is becoming more comfortable. This is cute, at least to us. He has his routine. He knows his boundaries. He comes when we call him and the other animals love him.

Duke was a real find. Please, if you are ever considering a new pet, adopt an adult looking for a home. They will love you forever and they will fit in most of the time.

Smelling Bad Smelling Things

I know this is weird but, I have had this splint on my finger for three weeks now. I change the thing daily and do my best to keep it dry.

My finger is starting to get white and wrinkly, and I just knew it was past due to start getting funky smelling.

Sure enough, this morning, I took a sniff and boy howdy did it smell. Then I kept smelling too it like a fool.

Why do I do that? Even Gigi couldn’t resist a sniff and she concurred.

Going Green

For those who think I am just a carbon belching greenhouse gas producing businessman; I have news for you.

I have installed those squiggly expensive light bulbs at home and in the office. They say they consume 13 watts of power and produce 60 watts of visible light.

This will redeem me for having to cut down that tree a few weeks ago to park my gigantic carbon belching greenhouse gas producing RV.

I am net even with the environment.

Window Tinting

I dropped off my pickup truck last night to get the windows tinted.

Whenever we ride somewhere in the summer, Gigi sits in the back seat with two dogs and the sun cooks them. I sit in the front and drive with two dogs and the air conditioning is keeping us cool.

I have made two attempts to get my windows tinted before.

Window tinting in this town appears to be a very seedy business. I would feel safer trying to buy some pot. I found a place last year that tinted windows and made an appointment. I showed up and the waiting room was filled with P Ditty Urban types and gangster looking Hispanics. It looked too much like a prison yard, so I turned around and left.

I did the same thing at another place a few months later. Identical clientele at both places.

Finally I found a nice fellow that said he would do the tinting for me. It should be ready tonight.

I get to take the Beast in to work this morning. The weather is perfect Beast weather.


My last name is so symmetrical. I like that.

Several Things are On My Mind

I feel ever so slightly guilty. You see, we are in a very bad dry spell. Not yet officially a drought, but will be if we don’t get some meaningful rain soon.

In the city, officials are asking people to cut back on water use. Everyone is starting to talk about how dry it is.

Now for my guilt; I love dry weather. I can leave the Jeep top off, my grass barely grows, I can play golf anytime and the ball travels farther on dry ground. Plus the air is dry. It feels good. The dogs don’t get as dirty, just dusty.

Any day now the summer humidity will arrive and the air will be stifling hot until September. Then we will have thunderstorms and tropical storms and the rain will come.

I might want to go to Bermuda one day. It is right off the coast of North Carolina. What turns me off is every brochure I have ever seen about Bermuda is the men have on Bermuda shorts with high socks. That looks stupid and hot.

I love Reggae music. I listen to the Reggae station on satellite radio all the time. The music is so real and I love the rhythm and beat.

I have always wanted an occasion that I could wear a kilt. Wearing a kilt in the south would be a good way to get your ass beat. I could pull it off maybe at one of the Scottish games they have in the mountains.

I'm A Deadbeat

This morning I was at Home Depot buying some lumber for my RV steps. I went to the contractor’s checkout. I always feel like a tough guy using the contactors area to pay.

I whipped out my credit card and the cashier said, “Sir, it was declined”.

What? Instantly you feel like a deadbeat even though you know the card is in good standing.

I joked and ran it through again.

“Sir, it was declined again”.

People are now in line looking at my deadbeat ass like, move on buddy. I feel like the cashier just told me in front of everyone that I have head lice and gonorrhea.

I paid with my debit card and walked out all ashamed.

I called the card company from the parking lot and they said there had been some strange activity on the card.

“Sir, did you authorize a Wall Street Journal subscription and did you join 4 Seasons wine club?”

“Yes, I drink wine and read the Wall Street Journal.”

“Okay then, I will release the account.”

Check It Out Part II

I made some stairs for the RV for my uncle Wendell and my soon to be elderly border collie.

The built in stairs are way too steep. It came with 3 steps for a 30 inch drop. Now we have 5 steps.

Check It Out

Check out my Jeep interior! I had the inside sprayed with Herculiner which is like Rino Liner. It makes the interior look better; it’s slip resistant, water proof and should be rust proof.

If I can ever part with this Jeep and leave it in St Croix, it should last longer now under the salt conditions.

I don’t know if this Jeep will ever see St Croix unless I move there.


Like most Americans I have Monday off for Memorial Day. But no matter how you disguise it, Mondays always feels like Monday to me. Monday is my least favorite day.

It is an adjustment day and the most serious day of the week. If I’m going to get grouchy, it’s going to be on a Monday.

Maybe I’ll have my head right for tomorrow.

Water Snobs

I never thought this would happen to me. I have turned into a water snob, this, from a guy who grew up drinking from a garden hose in the summer.

It started years ago when we moved to the country. We get our household water from a 350 foot well. All we do is filter the water and remove some of the iron with another filter. The water tastes great. No chorine taste is present.

On a side note, Gigi’s father will not drink this water. He is convinced that since the horses, dogs and squirrels poop outside, and then surely there are poop particles in the well water. I told him once we had installed a shit filter but he didn’t go for it.

Gradually I started drinking cheap bottled water while in the city. I hate the taste of city water now.

Gigi and I began to discern the various tastes of bottled water and have brand preferences. Our favorite is cheap old Sams Club water.

Never did I think that I would start craving premium bottled water but I have. My favorite is S.Pellegrino. I am having a glass now with a lime wedge.

Man I have turned into a fruit ball before my own eyes. I used to make fun of people like me that would pay $1.50 for a quart of water.

Do yourself a favor. The next nice meal, pour a couple of glasses of chilled S.Pellegrino into a big wine glass and add a lime or lemon wedge. It’s fantastic!

You Too?

Admit it; this has happened to you too.

I was driving down in Eastern North Carolina near Rockingham. There are a lot of ornamental stone quarries in this part of the state.

I had to pee like all get out. I pulled over to a tiny restaurant and run to the bathroom. I am standing there trying to do my business but can’t go. I’m reading the little sign about employees should wash their hands and stuff just to relax so I can pee.

I give it one more straining push when suddenly by brain steps in and says, “Dude. You are asleep and this is a dream about peeing. If you continue try to pee you will actually pee, but in the bed which is bad.”

I jumped up and tore off to the bathroom stepping on at least one dog.

Thank goodness my brain has an adult section that over rides regular Reggie sometimes.

Reggie’s Rum Runner

I found this cool rum recipe and can’t wait to give it a try. Terri and Michael, takes notes.

Take a cocktail shaker and fill it 3/4 with ice.

Now pour in two parts (ounces) of dark Cruzan rum. Then pour in one part of maple syrup. Then pour in one part fresh lime juice. Shake for 15 seconds and strain the mix into a chilled rocks glass. I think a chilled martini glass would be better personally. Garnish with a lime wedge.

How good would this be? The rum with the maple sweet and the acidity of the lime? I plan to go into the labs today to try this. I have already located a little bottle of Cracker Barrel maple syrup in the cabinet.

Crap, Crap, and Double Crap!

A week ago I took the jeep to get a liner sprayed in the metal interior. The jeep is still there all torn apart. I’m down one vehicle. That’s okay, I have two more.

Today I am having a guy come over and build up a pad for the behemoth camper, so I had to move the camper yesterday afternoon to a friend’s farm.

When I attempted to disengage the camper from my truck, the electric jacks failed to work. I checked fuses and wires but it would work at all. I could manually jack the 13,000 beast and elected not to do so. Now I’m down another vehicle and a camper.

I called Gigi to come over and pick me up. She was already in her PJs getting ready to rest. She had a nerve block yesterday.

Gigi started asking me a million questions about why it wouldn’t work. How the hell should I know? I pushed the button and the hydraulics would com on. Somehow this is my fault?

Now I have one car that I need tomorrow to go to work…its Gigi’s car.

Now if Goober doesn’t finish the drive way today so I can bring my truck and camper home, or Goober II doesn’t finish my Jeep, or if Goober III (me) can’t manually unhook the truck from the camper, then I am going to have to rent a darn car.

Too Darn Lazy......

Gigi and I are so lazy that sometimes that we call each other on the cell phone rather than getting up and walking to the other room to talk.

We did this last weekend in the RV and we did it again this morning.

How lazy is that?

The Bluebird of Happiness Craps Paint

I like bluebirds. Gigi and I have put up bluebird houses to attract them.

We now have at least three nests of baby bluebirds.

Did you know that bluebirds crap white latex paint? We have bluebird crap paint droppings all over our deck now.

I don’t like bluebirds as much now.

Male Mutilation

I realized that whether one is circumcised or not is not a topic to be discussed in polite society. Read no further if topic bothers you.

Does it make since that in the United States that a whole generations of men have had their penises docked like a dog’s tail?

Without any for thought, every little boy gets his God given parts cut off for no reason?

Does anyone even remember what a natural penis is supposed to look like?

It really pisses me off that I was circumcised when I was an infant without my permission. How is it, that society can accept chopping off part of the penis of helpless little baby boy, and no one but me is outraged? I have heard all the arguments for being circumcised.

Instead of being circumcised, I would rather have a permanent tattoo down there that says, “Wash daily using soap and water”.

Now you know how I feel about that.

I can hear Gigi now saying, “I can’t believe you blogged about that. Gross!”

Out With The Old

I feel kind of wasteful.

Yesterday I got a great deal on a used PC. It is a year old Dell Dimensions 1100 with a 2.77 GHZ chip, 512 memory, a legit copy of Windows XP Business, and a legit copy of Office 2003 business. I paid $75 for it. It is a great PC at a great price.

The reason I feel wasteful is a basically threw out two old functioning PCs that were badly outdated. I bought both back in 1998 when I opened my office. I paid probably $3,500 for the pair. Over the years I updated the memory, operating system and replaced hard drives. I even fixed the cooling fans on both PC.

But finally the old girls just couldn’t keep up. One just ran a web cam and the other was backup storage.

So today I stripped out the hard drives and memory and tossed both boxes in the dumpster.

I remember when PCs were so expensive. I bought my first in 1992 for $2,000. It was a 386 with a 80 MB hard drive and 4 megs of ram. I still have the chip around here somewhere. I took it home and learned how to use it. It had a 1400 cardinal modem that I used to go onto bulletin boards.

I later got Compuserve.

Then I got a used 486 from my SIL for $500. What a deal and what a good PC. I eventually gave that PC to my BIL. He met his current wife on that PC.

I have had a dozen or more PCs since, but I still feel wasteful when I don’t run a PC until it dies.

Oh well.

This $75 PC could have run NASA or NORAD back in 1992.

We are living in good times.

Cheap People

Cheap, as in stingy, people bug me. They are so obsessed about the value of money, that it is unbecoming.

Being cheap has nothing to do with the amount of money you have. It is an attitude about money and its value that bugs me, whether you have money or not.

I know cheap people who have plenty of money, and cheap people who barely get by.

Cheap people let money rule their lives. They are obsessed by money, they worship money.

I like generous people. I know wealthy generous people, and poor generous people.

Hurricane Preparedness

It’s that time to talk about hurricane preparedness. I think this is a very important topic in light of the criticism that the federal government has taken over the Katrina response.

Read the following very carefully.

You will have a weeks warning, maybe more that a hurricane is coming in your direction. Don’t act surprised or be unprepared when it comes.

Gather up your really important shit and leave. Walk if you have to. Hitch hike, catch a bus, ride with a friend, but leave and travel a great distance. 200 miles inland would be a good goal.

Realize that all your shit will be destroyed in your absence. This is no ones fault. Hurricanes do this. There have always been hurricanes and there will always be hurricanes.

You will have to resume your life after the hurricane. No one is going to come in and fix your stuff back to normal. You have to do this. Everyone wants their broken stuff fixed at once so expect to wait. Early on you will be expected to provide yourself with water and a place to go to the bathroom.

Weeks, months, and years will pass before you are back to normal.

Now you are prepared.

Day 2

Don’t think all is wine and roses here in this big fancy new RV. I have not yet wired up the unit for Direct TV so the satellite dish is useless. Cable is not offered at this site.

So, dear friends, we have to watch over the air TV. Worse than that, is the fact that the over the air TV is coming out of Wilmington, NC. Nothing happens in Wilmington.

The local news is quite entertaining. It is light, with no real content. They show the pet of the week, cover the local burning ban, have a live spot at the pier for the disabled anglers contest, etc.

There are tons of cars commercials for zero down, $99 a month cars.

Then the informercials play whenever there is not a network feed.

I’m watching one now about some miracle colon stuff. I already know more about my colon that I want.

Gigi commented that this is where the TV news people end up if you are fat and have bad hair. All of the TV personalities are a bit grain fed looking. One guy had a haircut that looked like Moe on the Three Stooges.

Other pressing RV issues are the stabilizing jacks are not quite up to par. At night whenever either of us walks, the wine glasses tinkle as they shake in the over the bar glass holder. Tinkling glasses can be a hardship of sorts.

The steps on the outside of this RV are way too steep. Peaches can’t go up or down them. Duke can go down but can’t get up. Cedie barely manages. Haley defies gravity and just floats around at will.

I am going to build a more gradual set of steps that can be carried around.

Lastly, I miss very much a constant Internet connection. The office here has a wireless connection that I use to post and check mail. The rest of the day I have to wonder what is going on in the world.

This morning I wanted go online to look for a Kingpin jack for the RV to stop the tinkling wine glasses. I’ll just have to wait.

Friendly Manitoban

Gigi and I are in Southport, NC this weekend shaking down the new RV 5th wheel.

This coach is awesome. The towing went like nothing even though this RV is massive. So far no big problems, just a few little things are wrong that can easily be fixed.

The folks across from us have a unit very much like ours. I looked over there and saw their truck tag said, “Friendly Manitoba”.

“You got to be kidding”, I thought.

I went over to introduce myself and there before be were two friendly Manitobans, sure enough. They lived 30 years in Winnipeg and have retired here, but still keep a home in Winnipeg.

She worked at the hospital there as a nurse. I’ll bet Chris and her have crossed paths. I can’t remember the hospital but she said it was big and I remember it started with a B.

A year ago I didn’t know a single Manitoban, now I know many and I have actually laid my eyes on two in the flesh!

Will wonders never cease?

I should have given them that Canadian penny back I found a few weeks ago.

Drawing Attention

Yesterday I made a redneck spectacle of myself and had no intension of doing so.

I live in Midland, NC, a small rural community just east of Charlotte. The population is about 5,000 with 96% being good old boy rednecks. Nice folks, good folks, just plain, white, redneck folks.

Apparently living here for 19 years has rubbed off on me. I have a big red F350 pickup. I have a red Jeep Wrangler. These are all symptoms of a redneck infestation.

My Jeep wrangler has a tow bar on the front. The guy that owned it before me used to tow it behind a motor home.

I needed to drop off my Jeep this afternoon to get the inside sprayed with Herculiner. Herculiner is this stuff like Rino Liner that makes metal rust proof and wear resistant. It will look nice inside versus the bare scratched metal I have now.

It made sense to me to hook the Jeep up to my truck and tow across town to the guy who is doing the spray job. Then I would not involve Gigi in driving me back.

So I hooked up the Jeep and stopped at the local vortex of redneckism, the Hess gas station at 51 and 24/27.

You would not believe the mouths hanging open when the rednecks saw both of these redneck icons joined together, the truck and the jeep. The only thing that would have drawn any more attention would be if I had taken one of dogs with me.

Bursting into Song

Reggie Bursting into SongThe weather has been so nice here that I just want to burst into song. I can’t do that though.

First, bursting into song is kind of girly. It is kind of Mary Poppinsish.

Second, I can’t sing worth a crap. It just wouldn’t do the weather the justice that I intend if I sang.

Third, assuming I could sing, and I was comfortable enough with manhood to burst into song, just what song would be appropriate to burst into?

One Manbrow, Another.....

What’s up with Sylvester Stallone’s eyebrow? He has one regular man eyebrow, and one woman eyebrow. The woman eyebrow looks like the puppet Madame’s eyebrow.

I'll Miss You Man

A friend of mine died today.

Ray Gooding was a pioneer black radio broadcaster here in Charlotte. He worked many years at the 50,000 watt blowtorch of the south, WBT AM.

At night WBT can be heard from Nova Scotia to Cuba.

I haven’t talked to Ray in a few years, but I can still hear his voice. He had me on his Sunday morning radio show once on WBT. That was a thrill for me.

I had lunch with him several times. He was a nut about germs.

Ray was a neighbor to Maurice Williams, who is a Motown Legend with his song, “Stay”, made famous again in the movie “Dirty Dancing”.

I’ll miss you Ray.

The Maiden Voyage of the RV

This weekend we plan to take the new RV out on its maiden voyage.

Originally we planned to go to Hilton Head, SC. Then we toyed with Jordon Lake near Raleigh, NC. Finally we thought about running up to my sister’s place at Smith Mountain Lake in Virginia.

The problem for all places is we couldn’t be guaranteed of spot at any place with shore power, water and sewer hookups.

I called a friend down in Southport, NC and she said to come on and she had a place for us at her RV Park.

So, we kill two birds with one stone. We take the camper on the first shakedown trip, and we get full family guilt relief by visiting Gigi’s mother who lives nearby.

Frankly I am a bit nervous about towing this monster. We have had some kind of RV since 1992. Towing in general is a bit nerve racking. The new fifth wheel actually tows much better but it is much heavier and requires a longer time to brake.

I am not familiar with hooking and unhooking, using the slide outs and general setup like I was before.

Today I got new 10 ply tires for the trip. Belly button lint excites me more than new tires. I knew however with weight comes friction and heat. I have had several; no three blowouts while towing and want to avoid another.

Tomorrow I get the front end aligned. More belly button lint. At 170,000 miles I guess I am due, don’t you think?

Lastly, Gigi and I are poster children for procrastination. We still haven’t packed away all the stuff in the new RV. We’ve only had 6 weeks you know. I guess we’ll get to it Thursday morning just hours before we leave.

We Got Our Golf On

It was golf Sunday for the mother of my Border Collies. Yes, Gigi and I headed to the club for a very rare day at the course …together.

Gigi banged a few ball around and as always looked the part. See how her blue stripes on her shoes match her blue eyes?

I shot a respectable for me 99.

I need to shut up though. I keep reminding Gigi just what we would be doing now if we had gone to the Virgin Islands as planned.

It was hard to beat golf together on a perfect spring day with the lady I love.

Cold Stuff Wrap Up

I feel a bit weird, an outcast of sorts. While most of the world loves ice cream, I could take it or leave it.

I have had good ice cream too. I have tried it all. It seems just too fat and rich for me. Maybe it is the mouth feel or it is too damn cold. Please don’t get me wrong…I am not a health nut.

I heard a local radio spot the other day for an ice cream that had chocolate on the right and vanilla on the left. Or, if you preferred, you could turn it around and have vanilla on the right and chocolate on the left. I thought that was funny and clever advertising.

My favorite dessert is homemade yellow layer cake with chocolate icing. Just don’t throw on any ice cream. I’ll eat the ice cream but I don’t appreciate like some of you. You are casting pearls at swine giving me ice cream.

I spent much of my life avoiding cold stuff that other people love. You’ll never catch me ice skating, snow skiing, ice fishing, or tromping through the snowy woods.

Although, Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost is by far my favorite poem. I bet you didn’t think I had a favorite poem, did you?

It goes back to, I don’t like cold stuff. It seems I have blogged a lot about cold stuff this week.

Another Life, Another Time

Ali’s blog yesterday reminded me of when I was 20 and yes….I worked on the railroad. Yep, I was a gandy dancer. I rode the rails, fixed the rails and lived with a rather dangerous bunch in cheap hotels.

I went to two years of college and thought my brain was going to melt if I didn’t get a break. So I quit college and started working on the railroad building small lengths of tracks called spurs. This is the track that would lead from a main line from a switch to a warehouse.

The men that work on building tracks are a hard bunch. You live and work long hours outdoors in every kind of weather. Several of the men on my crew had done hard time in prison. Most were African Americans. About half had severe drinking or drug problems. I got along with all of them. I had to, I was afraid of most of them.

Now introduce half educated white boys from the city (my roommate and I) and you’ve got yourself an adventure.

The foreman almost didn’t hire me when he saw me. I am short compared to the average male population, vertically challenged. I asked him to give me a chance and he did.

I couldn’t believe how hard the work was. The tools weighted a ton. We would pick up railroad ties with tie dogs, steel rails with rail dogs, and manually hammer in spikes with spiking hammers. There is even a tool called a dog dick.

We did get to ride a cool little car with a gas motor up and down the tracks to get to our work. It was a real treat to ride in the locomotive. I couldn't believe how smooth the ride was up there.

I learned how to build and set tracks. In the US the rails are 4 feet 8 ½ inches apart. You have tie plates, frogs for switches, spikes, spike pullers and nippers.

And God knows I shoveled enough stone to make a mountain.

My hands would blister, my body ached and my face was leathery tan. I was determined that I could do this and I did. My body never actually got used to the work. I ached everyday. But I was young.

I didn’t know that my body type was one of those that developed big muscle mass when strained and trained. Heck I never worked out with weights. Soon I became very broad chested and super strong. The other workers would call me over if some really heavy lifting needed to be done. I swear this is true; I actually split two shirts down the back on two separate occasions from my back muscles expanding.

We traveled up and down the east coast and stayed on jobs 1 to 3 weeks. We would then move on to another job.

It was fun coming to a new town and seeing all the sites, even if the towns were small. We once had a 2 week job in Washington, DC and a 3 week job in Birmingham, AL. Most of the other towns were small.

The 1776 “Spirit of America” passed us once while working in Burlington. It was a beautiful steam locomotive with cars all beautifully restored for the bicentennial. The train blew the steam whistle and the engineer waved to us.

The winter of 76/77 was brutal in North Carolina so we didn’t work one January for almost a month. We were living in Boone, NC at the time. For almost a week the temperatures reached -15 below and the wind would howl. The wind blew so hard that our kitchen cabinets would blow open. We could see frost from our breath in the kitchen. We ended up eating beans for a while so we could buy heating oil.

There was a devastating flood around Easter of 1977 in the coaling mining country of western Virginia, near a town called Clintwood, VA.

My Lord that place was backwards. It is a very closed population with very different ways.

The tracks there were washed out from the flood and had to be repaired now. The coal had to flow and it flowed on the rails. Otherwise the economy there would grind to a halt. We would pull 16 hour shifts to speed the work along.

We were able to do jobs others couldn’t do because we were such a small company and we still built tracks by hand. Most of the larger companies had machines that did the back breaking work. Not us. We got a good reputation there and were hired by the local railroad to stay indefinitely doing track maintenance.

That is when the fun ended and I decided college wasn’t so bad.

After a year on the railroad I returned to the books. My body returned to normal and I graduated two years later.

Oh the stories I could tell. I wouldn’t have exchanged that year on the railroad for anything.

See You Soon I hope

This is the second in a series about our friends on St Croix.

We were supposed to go to St Croix tomorrow for a week, but decided to stay home instead. We have so much to do here, and Lady needs us anyway. We would worry leaving her for a week so far away.

I miss Terry and Michael, and their distinguished man dog Goliath.

Terry and Michael are so real. They always are fun and have genuineness to them that you don’t see on the mainland. I think about them often.

I know I must seem uptight to them because I am a businessman who gets a week or two a year to unwind on the island. But Gigi and I connect with them.

We have known Terry professionally since 2003, but became buds more recently. We met Michael and Goliath just last May. I guess Terry thought it was safe to bring them out.

Then Peter…oh Lord Peter. Nuf said.

Leslie and Mitch; those guys are passionate about what they do. Peter is passionate about anything.

I hope to see you guys in September, definitely in February ’08 God willing. We love you guys.

Slick Ass Receipts

Is it just me, or is every getting these waxy ink proof credit cards receipts lately?

I use my corporate credit card for most purchases. It allows me to accumulate air miles so I can take fun trips to far off places like St Croix.

More and more I have noticed the paper receipt presented to me to sign is shiny and waxy…and ink proof. The paper is so slick that the ball on a ball point pen just slides around leaving an impression of my signature with no ink dispensed.

Who thought that was a good idea? I hate them.

Odds and Ends

I hate cold ketchup and cold syrup. So why do people store it in the refrigerator?

We store both ketchup and syrup in the regular cabinet, and then it is room temperature when we eat it. Perfect! It never goes bad in the cabinet.

Now this does not include real maple syrup which will get funky on you in a minute. I’m talking about Log Cabin or Mrs. Butterworth fake maple syrup.

Dog Health

Gigi and I discuss the state of our dogs crap way too much. You can’t be too careful when you live in a small home with 4 dogs.

We have found over the years that you can determine the state of a dog’s health by the type of crap they let. Often we can preempt a disastrous situation with Peptol Bismol if we recognize the early onset of trouble.

Just this morning, Gigi relayed a thrilling crap story from yesterday.

Gigi said, “Cedie and I were at Target yesterday when she had to shit. She dragged me down a ravine and began to launch what looked like Jules Verne’s, The Nautilus. It looked fine but then I saw a glossy finish”.

This was her was to alert me that Cedie may be in for some diarrhea issues, so keep and eye on her. Dose her once with Peptol Bismol tablets.


I played golf hurt today and managed a good round in spite of my injury.

I have this splint on my right pinky finger and the last joint must not bend for at least 8 weeks. I am right handed so I wear a glove on my left hand, and interlock my injured right pinky to the index finger of my left hand. Sounds like twister, huh?

The finger interlock is impossible now so the finger just sticks out.

Today I had on the splint with extra tape because I sweat a lot and the splint would fly off otherwise once I worked up a good lather. Then I fashioned an oversized right golf glove to wear on my right hand to further protect my finger. I cut off all the fingers of the glove except the pinky finger. Then I wore the glove with only my pinky and part of my right thumb covered. It worked like a charm.

I can continue golf with my splint on and finger extended and everything stays in place.

Thanks also to my sweet bride for assisting me daily in changing this splint from a day splint to night splint, while I yell at her directing the tape placement. She is an angel for putting up with me. I love her.

Fast Women, Canadian Coins and My Pinky

I ate lunch at the mall today with some buddies of mine.

We started to cross the street in a parking lot on foot, and were damn near run over twice by some 30 something year old women. They were speeding by the pedestrian walkway that also had a speed hump. All this in a parking lot where people and cars share space!

I commented that if we were some fuzzy little squirrel or a dog, they would have slammed on brakes and hit another car to avoid us. But we are just men though.

I nearly always stop and let someone cross. If the crosser looks dangerous enough to be a carjacker then I’ll make them wait. Otherwise I let them cross.

I need a squirrel suit I guess.

While at the mall by friend bent over and picked up a strange looking copper coin. It was scratched badly, but I could make out what looked like a reefer leaf on one side.

“That’s a maple leaf you idiot”, my friend said.

Oh, a Canadian coin. We don’t see them much here.

Finger Update

This could be bad for golf. I will have to keep the pinky hyper extended in a plastic splint for at least 8 weeks, and possibly longer.

I could grip the club with my pinky extended like a Brit sipping tea, and this may work. I must be careful however not to let it fall off or the clock starts all over.

I will endeavor however and give golf a whirl on Thursday.

Possible Season Ending Injury!

Friends, I went to a hand specialist this morning to see why my right pinky finger is so bent down, and why my left hand is so sore.

It seems I have torn something in my finger that allows me to straighten my finger normally. I am to be fitted with a splint that and cannot allow my finger joint to bend for 12 weeks.

This finger is my interlocking finger for my golf grip.

I am devastated! What does the season hold for me?

I will find out this afternoon. Certainly there is an alternative grip I could use allowing the pinky to stay out of the line of play? I sure hope so.

Sometimes I'm Picky...Sometimes I'm Not

I have very loose and different rules when it comes to consumable liquids.

For example, coffee needs to be served to me hot, but not scalding hot. I may linger with a cup until it is room temperature and still enjoy the coffee. Coffee takes on a different and good flavor at room temperature. However, I would not want to be served coffee at room temperature. I’ll come back to a cup sometimes hours later and continue drinking it. I am enjoying a room temperature cup of coffee now.

I like Diet Pepsi right out of the can at room temperature. I am not concerned about germs on the can. I just pop open the can and start drinking. I like it cold too, but don’t prefer it cold. It tastes different each way.

I do not like cold water. Everyone serves it cold so I bring my own. Cold water makes my head and nose hurt. Serve me water at room temperature please.

I am so used to drinking well water at home that water in the city tastes like pool water to me. I can smell the chlorine and chemicals used to make river water drinkable as soon as I raise a glass to my nose.

Last night I heard one of the dogs drinking water. Dogs make water sound so good. I can tell who is drinking the water with my eyes closed. It was Peaches. I jumped up and guzzled down a room temperature bottle of water myself.

Beer however should be cold, but not the same cold. I like full bodied beers a little warmer and light lagers very cold.

Wine has its own set of rules. Usually room temperature is good for a red but ideally I like them best at 60 degrees or so. A white wine is best to me at 42 degrees.

Milk however must be served cold. No exceptions!

Yo Momma

Does your mother read your blog? My mother doesn’t read my blog, but I think sometimes I would like her to read it. It would give her more insight to her only son.

When I was young, back in the days of dinosaurs, our relationship with our parents was more formal.

We didn’t live with our girl friends; we didn’t drink in front of our parents; we didn’t curse or smoke in front of them. We weren’t being hypocrites; we were being respectful to our parents.

I am still formal and respectful to my mother although we share more adult topics. Yet she is still my mother, I love her and respect her.

My blog is honest and not dirty or disrespectful. I don’t talk about a lot of things in my life, but I think the blog is representative of my life. I leave out business and any big conflicts.

Anyway…..I guess I’ll not tell her the url for now.

Comfort Food Needed....Now!

I want some Caribbean food, and I want it now!

I was going to order some goat meat online the other day and make my own, but Gigi started gagging and stuff.

Down in the USVI, there is a little place called Smokies. Everyday they have the best food that makes Gigi gag, but I love it. Oh to have a jonnie cake, meat stuff jonnie cakes, smoked herring and rice, goat water, ox tails etc. This all is island comfort food at it best.

The ladies that cook this food laugh when I order. They are surprised that a tourist from the mainland likes this stuff.

I checked all the local Caribbean places here and the menus are nothing like what I need. There is more to Caribbean food than jerk chicken.

Nice Hack

I have found a useful hack that basically turns Google into a file sharing machine.

Say, for example, you want to hear a snappy little AC/DC tune, or the soothing lyrics of Van Halen. Just type in the artist name, make sure it is set on songs, and hit enter.

The results are amazing.

A Lazy, Busy Day

This has been a fun day. We basically sat on our collective asses while a cool rain fell over Charlotte.

In town, Tiger Woods is playing at Quail Hollow CC in the Wachovia Championship. The town is abuzz.

Gigi, who is a very fun date, and I went to a Kentucky Derby party in the old money section of Charlotte. These guys are real blue bloods and we can mingle just fine with them.

We mingled, sipped mint juleps, and had a very good time. Then we were off to a Cinco de Mayo dinner at the club.

Now, I am home and I sprung for the pay per view of the Oscar De la Hoya vs. Floyd Mayweather boxing match. I hope it is worth $54. It is cheaper than going to Vegas and watching ringside.

Be As Nasty As You Want To Be

Gigi and I personally spew 33 metric tons of carbon in the air every year.

You know how I know? Go to and you’ll first see some sultry, scantily dressed young ladies with their bellies showing, all happy and stuff.

SIDEBAR – Guys, refresh the page a few time to see them all.

Then proceed to the carbon calculator to see just how much stuff your family spews in the air.

Feel guilty? Don’t despair. You can buy your way out of this guilt with carbon offsets. Yes, keep on polluting and know your pollution sin is taken away by the fine folks at Be Green.

For $39.67/month Gigi and I can freely contaminate our atmosphere guilt free. Be Green promises to plant enough trees to offset my pollution.

Let me find my checkbook. Yeah, right.

My Terms....

Today I experienced an event that was once in a lifetime. It was so significant that I bother to blog about it.

I know this has happened to all of you. You are working away, stapling stuff together when suddenly out of nowhere, you run out of staples. I hate that.

You first experience the disappointment of the misfire.

Second, your work is interrupted as you hunt for refills. Then you load the stapler and give it a few fires to see if it’s functioning correctly.

Lastly, you resume your work where you left off….a little more bitter that where you started.

How could such a little machine control me?

Today, I was happily stapling away when I got a hunch that I may be out of staples. I looked at the little reveal where the staples are loaded and saw a red plastic thingy. Upon further investigation I found that indeed I was completely out of staples.

Ahh haa, you nasty little machine. I am loading you with staples on my terms, not yours.

For once I preempted the disappointment of the staple failure.

I feel more in control.

I'm A Bad Man

I am very ashamed. I have played golf for the past two days, right here in the middle of the work week.

I am salty, dehydrated, a bit smelly, tanned and happy. Oh I love the summer!

We laughed today like kids. It was a tournament for my church and I knew we had no chance of winning. So we decided to have fun like 14 year olds. I laughed so hard once that I thought I was going to pop a tube and kill over. You worry about such stuff when you are over 50.

At the end they made sure every one won something. I came home with a homemade coconut pound cake, a coupon for a dozen red roses with greenery, and a vase, and a wine cooler thingy and a cheese board. The wine cooler and cheese board will be cool in the new RV.

Tomorrow I must return to the salt mines. My fun is over until next week. I have two games scheduled for Thursday and Friday of next week.

Three Mini Posts


Several of you have asked how Lady, our elderly horse is doing. The warm weather has been good for her bones. She should do well until it gets stifling hot in July. She is a warm weather horse but they all hate it when it is the 90’s.

I just patted her big fat butt and put her to bed.

My Jeep

I drove my Jeep to work yesterday with the doors off and all the windows out.

I enjoy the smells coming and going. In the afternoon I could smell grass being mowed. I smelled dirt when I past a field being plowed. Back in town I smelled hamburgers and chicken frying as I passed fast food restaurants.

I could hear all the radios blasting in peoples cars. They think they are silent to me, but I can hear them, even with their windows up.

When I drive the Jeep, I feel so connected to the real world.

Golf Today

I played golf today, and the weather was great. It is in the upper 80’s here and I am in my weather zone. I love warm weather.

I play golf tomorrow for Jesus. I don’t feel guilty when I play golf for our church’s annual fund raiser.

I lathered up with so much sun lotion this morning that I could barely sweat.

I thought about Trish the Dish and her white feet. Trish…get some golf sandals. I have brown feet now with a white stripe over the top of my foot.

I too would be suspicious if I was getting a prostate exam and the doctor said, “I see you play a lot of golf”.