I think they think the label is cool and they look cool with the orange slice.
Personally the beer is so mild that I’m not sure if a hop ever visited the brewery. I play along though when anyone whoops out a Blue Moon.
I forgot my camera and left it in the RV back in
I’m trying to figure when I can go back and I’m afraid it will be late June. Man that bread will be funkeee!
And finally I have gone to Code Yellow this morning on the Wreggie Security color-coded Advisory System when travel to
Well, I made it back safe from
This is my last trip down to Southport until I go to
Also, I about forgot, I decided to take Yellow Boy out of retirement for on last whirlwind tour of the island. These yellow swim trunks have shown up in far too many pictures so I abruptly retired them from service last September.
Well I’ve miss Yellow Boy and grabbed the trunks before I left the island.
I’ve gotta go and take Cedie for a Jeep Ride. What a beautiful day it is here in
Yesterday I met a young man who was in the last throws of freedom before he headed off to sea for a few years. He was a merchant marine getting ready to board a ship from Sunny Point, loaded with munitions and was headed to the
I forget that the nation’s largest munitions port is a few miles up the road. Just about every weapon we possess passes down the
Oh and there is the Brunswick Nuclear Plant just up the road. They have a reputation for safety violations, at least early on. Nobody complains anymore about nuclear power so long as their toaster keeps working.
I talked to an older man yesterday and he used a local landmark in conversation like anyone who would refer to the post office and the town elementary school as a point of reference.
“You go up 211 and just beyond Worm and Coffee you go left.”
Yes, I know exactly where he was talking about because he invoked the famous
I bought a casting net this morning after seeing several people pulling up shrimp at low tide. The limit here is 100 per person per day in the inland waters. Me, Gigi, Cedie, that’s 300 shrimp.
I realize that casting a net properly is an acquired talent. I watched a few YouTube videos last week and decide to spring for one today. The guy in the store even took me to the parking lot to demo his style. He used his teeth along with both arms and hands.
He told me if I cast the net on a bull shark then expect a ride since the net rope is wrapped around your arm.
When I got out to the truck this little boy about 10 asked me to roll down my window. He said, “Mister, that net ain’t easy to throw. You need to practice a lot. I started with a 6 foot net and I’m up to a 12 net.”
I smiled and thanked him.
Now the net is wadded up in my floorboard awaiting the first Origami II excursion down here.
Speaking of Origami, I borrowed a pop rivet gun big enough to fix the broken rivet. She’s back and ready for action.
And yesterday I was cruising around in my Jeep "Shore Patrol" when I ran across the real deal Marine Patrol. I thought maybe I was in trouble but the guy ignored me.
Supper (remember, it was the last supper, not the last dinner) last night was essential man food of beer and wings.
There is a little redneck place across from me that is a wing joint and bar packed with the most colorful rednecks.
Rednecks are truly a different race of white people.
I sat at the bar while the guy beside me ate a pound of crab legs, a cheese burger, a baked potato and some peel and eat shrimp. It was so much food that he had to take a bathroom break.
A lovely young woman across the bar in a sun dress and a barbed wire tattoo around her upper arm was so drunk that she kept falling asleep while sitting up. Her head would nod and she would wake up, talk, take a sip of wine and doze off.
I ordered some medium hot wings and some
When I order wings I play along and get blue cheese dressing with my celery. What the hell is celery doing in this picture? Why not apple slices?
Celery in my book does not pair well with spicy wings. Same for mint jelly and lamb, “No thank you, I’ll take peach preserves with my steak.”
Oh, how about a big old glass of milk with your water melon?
I put my ramp in place today and it works better than I expected and it didn’t install as I expected. It’s difficult to custom build something 200 miles away from memory but it works just fine.
Best of all the ramp will break down in three sections at about 45 lbs each for moving.
Even better news is my sewer valve repair wasn’t as severe as feared. I ordered two new extension rods today that I can screw on the next trip down.
Finally the ultimate in ruintness…..this is on the door of my RV.
I didn’t sleep all that great last night. Lying in bed I was trying to determine whether the sun was coming up or was I seeing a street light?
I stumbled into the living room darkness to see if the clock was on from the last visit when my foot landed squarely on something very slick and cold.
No please…..not my nemesis Mr. Dog Shit…please no.
I flicked on the light and sure enough shit had visited me in the night….and it had attacked me personally. It was well embedded in my foot.
This was not time for panic because I was on my own. No Gigi to say, “I’ll take care of it honey.”
I subdued my olfactory senses and began cleaning while a guilty dog tried to apologize.
In the back of my mind I remembered what Michael had said, “See, shit is unavoidable. You thought you had shit licked with the narrow gull escape, but shit had bigger plans for you.”
Haley and I made it to
I fed Haley and headed out to the Yacht Basin Provision Company.
Eating at the
When you walk in you are standing in the kitchen with people screaming at each other. There is a line to pay, and a line to order, but no visible menu. I looked behind me and found a chalkboard menu.
It was my turn and I ordered the crab cake burger and some fries with a beer. She asked my name told me to walk to the cooler and get my beer and have a seat outside and they would find me.
Sure enough, in a few minutes I could see my order and the waitress was looking for some black guy named Reggie. She finally called my name when she realized the crowd was all white.
The food was good but the system was confusing. I didn’t quiet know how to go about getting a second beer so I left.
Maybe soon I’ll get the hang of the place and be a cool person too.
Oh my…Peaches has the perfect storm of dog gas this morning. I actually think she is proud. Oh my…somebody open a window.
This afternoon I roll down to the coast with Haley and the Jeep in tow. I am planning to put up the dog ramp I built last week, repair the sewer valve and other odds and ends.
This morning I got five bales of fresh cut hay from our local supplier. The horses literally drooled when I unloaded it.
Did you see the storey about the lost parrot that told the vet his address? How smart is that bird?
My partner at work has a salt water aquarium and added a shrimp a few weeks ago. That little shrimp has the best personality. He thinks he owns that tank.
It makes me feel a bit guilty for all the shrimp I’ve eaten….I’ll get over it though.
I ate lunch today with someone who is not a pizza crust eater, this is a shame. It’s like blowing the foam off a beer.
In case you think I have been just sitting around breathing through my mouth the past few days, well, you are wrong. I have been busy rebuilding my sister’s web site to showcase her art. Take a look at www.judyfowler.com.
A few weeks back we rented a car down in Southport from
She was just trying to be nice.
Careful now….
Yep, my DFF (dog friend forever) Peaches.
Peaches is getting a little unsure on her feet. Last year I built her some steps for the RV to trim down the angle and effort. This year I have built her a ramp to further assist her going vertical 36 inches.
The ramp is truly an engineering marvel conceived in my brilliant mind.
It breaks down in three sections for moving and storage.
I have it packed in the truck awaiting my
Yesterday I had a birds eye view from my office window of the entire hubbub from the parking deck collapse. What made me laugh continuously was the posturing of the Charlotte Police Department and the Charlotte Fire department.
The facts: At 8:20 AM a concrete slab fastener failed in our parking deck causing a pancake effect on two floors. No one was injured.
For the rest of the day I watched 5 fire trucks and countless Medic trucks come and go while a big chunk of the Adam district sat around the yellow tape keeping idiots from going back to their car for whatever reason.
A helicopter hovered overhead until early afternoon and all four local TV stations showed dynamic footage of concrete.
Now get this, sometime during the day the city slipped in a bus labeled
Much ado about nothing, old shit and buildings break people. The people that built the deck were a compilation of the lowest bidders assembled by Joe Sixpack. Fix it and move on.
Move along, nothing here people……
I switched political parties today. Until today I had been registered with the same party since I was 18.
It feels a bit funny…I am now unaffiliated.
I had hives today. This is maybe the third time in my life that I have been afflicted with hives.
I woke up itching on my sides. My upper arms itched too. By noon I could see red spots popping out on my wrists. (I had a long sleeve shirt on)
Under my clothes I was writhing with itch.
When I got home I undressed and saw I had darn near a breakout from my knees to the back of my head.
This reminded me of once back in my college days I got a sudden jock itch from my knees to my nipples. It was like a
I took an over the counter allergy tab and I am doing better tonight.
I’ve been planning my daring repair mission to
Then maybe coat the rod connection with epoxy.
Otherwise, I am told that I must replace the valve itself which would involve shit. I’ve paid my shit dues (see previous post) and I would have to remove the underbelly cover, working in tight quarters.
Now I need to get a pop rivet gun to pop one damn rivet on the boat.
Then I need to figure out why the ceiling fan stopped working on the RV.
And finally build a dog ramp.
My buddie that was going to help me is unable to go now so I’ll do it alone. Man I am so non mechanical. Anyone care to join me over Memorial Day weekend? Bring your tools.
Gigi is coming home today and I am looking forward to that.
I made my weekly stop this morning at McDonalds for an Egg McMuffin at the dangerous neighborhood where everyone gets shot.
The microphone on the drive thru was so loud my hair blew back.
I drove to the pay window and there sat a young black man with a very scarred up face like someone had cut him several times with a knife. I wondered if he had evolved a defense mechanism having lived his life in this neighborhood, you know, like a flounder changes colors to protect himself.
I told him the speaker was so loud that the deaf could feel vibrations a block away. He smiled then got serious.
I drove to the next window and told the girl I could barely hear the speaker and she might want to turn it up a bit. I wonder if she did turn up the volume.
I picked up my EM and drove on.
Did I mention our parking deck collapsed at our new office this morning 20 minutes before I arrived? Didn’t think so. I guess it wasn’t my time.
I don’t know now if anyone is trapped but early reports sounded good like no one was even injured.
I have a man issue that I need some help with. Ladies, please don’t turn away, you can help me by asking your husband.
I know what a rivet is. That is it. That is all I know about rivets.
My little boat is made of 72 different sized rivets, I know, I called.
One of my rivets that holds on the foam around the top of my boat failed while I was in Hilton Head, SC.
I called Porta-Bot and talked to the man himself, Sandy. He said it was rare to see that rivet fail and he would gladly send me a replacement rivet just for that particular application.
I got the rivet today and don’t know what the hell to do now. How do I extract the old one? How do I install the new one? I only have one rivet so I can’t practice.
Please gentlemen, share with me the secrets of rivets. I am clueless.
And so concludes our first commute to our coastal home of
As you recall, I towed the Jeep behind my truck last Friday. Haley and I drove the Jeep back last night.
I woke up this morning with 4 days of beard growth, a tan face and a good attitude about Monday.
Now I am planning a daring repair mission over Memorial Weekend to repair the sewer valve and to build a ramp for my dogs.
Before you conclude my dogs are a sorry lot remember that Cedie only has three legs, Duke has full use of three legs, Peaches is old and heavy and looses her balance.
Haley is the only dog that can still defy gravity and float most anywhere she pleases.
I never did get a chance to get the boat in the water since we had visitors the only day possible.
We found some good places to eat and hang out on the water front down at the yacht basin. Several have boat slips for guests so I’ll be there by boat next time.
Oh, one last thing. I bought a new and bigger anchor as Micky T suggested.
Good stuff first. My sister called early and she and Al decided to come up for lunch and to visit at our new place. Etta lives just below
The weather here was perfect, warm 82ist, light breeze and puffy clouds.
I stripped down the Jeep bare naked doors and all. Etta and Al arrived and we went for a cruise down to the shore line of
Meanwhile….back at the RV the K9’s chitlins were percolating.
We at lunch at an outdoor café and had a special with cucumber salad, boiled shrimp, fries and hush puppies. It was fresh and fantastic. The service was awesome.
We were warned by the waiter not even to make any gesture of giving food to the gulls or we would be swarmed in seconds and covered in gull crap instantaneously. A crap storm was avoided.
We browsed some shops where I found this cool as can be crab claw butane lighter. I don’t smoke but could resist this neat lighter. I first thought I would give it to my cigar smoking brother in law Tom, but I may keep it for myself in the RV to light candles.
We decided to come back to the RV mid afternoon to let out the dogs. We were greeted as we opened the doors to what only can be described at a shit tsunami.
I’m not sure what set it off but all four dogs had the runs. The air was thick with the stench as I screamed at all four to go outside. They looked like sick kids. All four were crimped up with the butt heaves doing the dribble walk. It was nightmarish...like some zombie movie.
Thank God I have a sweet woman that went in and cleaned all that stuff up. She used the new magic pet scent remover and the place looked a good as new.
I am incapable of doing what she did. I would have simple put up a for sale sign and deeply discounted the RV and driven home. You see, if I did what she did I would have to contend with cleaning up vomit as well.
Later I decide to make some preparations for leaving Sunday. I went over to purge the black water tank (sewage). I pulled the stick that release the valve and decide to pull out my golf clubs to take back home. As I pulled the clubs I snapped the shit valve on the RV. Now I’ve got a potential 75 gallon shit problem.
I managed to finish emptying the tank and carefully pushed the valve back in place. Whew! I’m okay for now but this shit valve will have to be fixed on the next trip down.
Oh joy!
To the left: Duke, aka Doomsday, aka Bad to the Bone, enjoys a ride on
I had planned a day on the water based on an early week forecast but their was small craft warnings out so I decided on Plan B. Heck, it was very rough with seas 10 to 14 feet.
Plan B was to take the top off the Jeep and go cruising, ah I mean Shore Patrol with the dogs.
Each dog got their turn and finally we piled all four in the Jeep along with Gigi in the back and took a ride around
Today I hope to get in the water. There have been Atlantic White Whale sightings off the coast. I would love to see on of those babies but I’m afraid they are too far out for my vessel.
Besides, I plan to stay inshore in the waterways.
It got warm and humid here today. How come bad smells smell worse when it is humid?
The world smells like cat pee or asses today.
Gigi and I arrived in It took me forever to back in the 5th wheel. I hate the way a 5th wheel backs. I much rather back a traditional trailer. The 5th tows better hands down.
I’m headed back home to work and then plan to get back here by weeks end. Gigi is going to stay for the week with the dogs. I’m taking Haley with me back to
Early Friday I plan to head back with the Jeep in tow along with some other stuff to round out our new home at the beach. Yes I know it’s an RV in a trailer park but it sounds better to say it’s my beach house.
We may have found a new favorite place to RV.
Hilton Head, SC has something for everybody, whether you are filthy rich or any ordinary person. The place is low key and well preserved in it natural state. Any development is well hidden.
We stayed at the RV resort and Yacht club. The site we stayed on was waterfront with a floating dock. The site was owned by Mark Martin, any NASCAR fan will know that name.
The dock allowed me to set up my little boat Origami II and continue with the motor break in and getting familiar with boating.
I learned many lessons over the many hours I spent on the water:
Things can go wrong quickly, have a plan b.
Tie the anchor rope on more securely.
Add an anchor to the shopping list.
Salt water is very salty and sticks to everything. There was enough dried salt on my motor to collect. My skin had visible salt and my toenails were white from salt.
Reference a tide chart before heading out. The tide here changes 7 feet or so and makes some waters completely impassible.
Apparently the world renowned physicist, Dr. Stephen Hawking, has a part time job at NOAA announcing the weather forecasts for southern SC and the
Get a local nautical chart and know where the shoals are. This along with knowing the tide will keep the prop out of the dirt.
Get more familiar with the loading of the boat and setting the trim. One person in this boat is very different than two people. It actually runs better with two people. Under power by myself, the nose would tend to plow after the boat planed.
All in all the boat performed well. I spent hours following dolphin. Sunday I took the boat all the way to the ocean to the wayward buoys. I saw a small sea turtle coming up for air and some black dolphin. In the shallows I saw many large horseshoe crabs, jelly fish, and schools of fish always swimming for their life from a larger fish.
If I were a rich man…I would be coming back to
The climate has become inhabitable once again here for outdoor activity with minimal clothing.
It is quite lovely here, the foliage is out, people are out and the murder rate is up (that’s not lovely). I never have figured out why people start murdering each other when it gets warm.
Thanks to my northern farmers for the ability for my horses to survive the winter on Yankee hay. The horses did quite well on the trucked in hay and I should make it just fine until the mid May local hay harvest. It looks like it will be a good crop too.
We have seen a lot of needed rain this winter. The lakes, rivers and reservoirs are full.
We had a service man out yesterday to check our water well equipment. For you city folks, we have a well that is 350 feet deep and it pumps free water out for our house, barn and guest house.
The water is high in iron so we have a contraption that removes the iron and an additional particle filter. What comes out is damn good, cold water. It tested nearly perfect yesterday for chemicals, minerals and ph.
We didn’t have it tested for bacteria so that will be necessary.
And finally looking forward…
Every year we spend the 4th of July holiday at Jekyll Island Campground in
The 4th of July is my favorite holiday, it trumps all holidays in my mind.
Most everyone in the
The weather is always warm if not knee buckling hot. Add in the traditional humidity and you have a steam bath like atmosphere just right for a spectacular afternoon thunderstorm.
The traditional activity for the day is by the pool or hanging out at the beach. The traditional food is grilled hamburgers and hot dogs with beer and soda. For desert we have water melon or cake with fruit. In years past I would make homemade ice cream.
Always there is a carnival at neighboring St Simons Island. Usually some of us go there, some ride bikes, some hang at the beach, each does his own thing.
At the end of the day we are treated to fireworks on the beach and swear they are the best we have ever seen.
Once it is over, it is over. No leftovers, no special cleanup, and no one’s team lost anything. Professional sports have not attached themselves to this holiday. Oh there’s a race at Daytona but it only fall’s on the 4th every few years by accident.
It’s a great holiday.
I just remembered something that I do fairly often in my dreams.
In my dreams I do not have the ability to run. Sometimes I can barely walk. Both tasks require tremendous effort.
What I have done to solve this mobility problem is I have acquired a tray or maybe a wide skateboard is a better description. I can sit or lie face down and move quite quickly using my knuckles for propulsion. It is quite chimp-like to watch me move along.
I recall moving as fast as a car over great distances using just my knuckles and this skate board. It takes very little effort.
These skateboard setups, along with flying, are my main means of transport in my dreams.
Yesterday was a day set aside just for me, yes, it was going to be a man day for me, my Jeep, and a group of men. I have looked forward to this day for weeks.
The weather for the first time this year was warm. I had the top off the Jeep and a 2:20 tee time with two of my first cousins.
My plan was to run a few errands, hit the practice range, have some lunch and dive into a fun and warm round of golf.
Turns out my golf sucked so bad that I desperately wanted to leave after 9 holes. It was humiliating. It was like I had never played before. I may lay off for a few weeks and quit.
I am so glad that round is behind me.
Next week Gigi and I head to Hilton Head, SC for a wedding. We are staying at a fancy boy RV park. At this place you must have a late model 5th wheel or motor home. No travel trailers and no pop-up campers.
On Sunday we are moving the 5th wheel to
What the owner has done for us is set up a temporary site in
Well, it is time for Saturday chores, cleaning gutters before the rain and trimming the grass.
Oh, and keep a good thought for the Carolina Panthers in today’s NFL draft.
I sent ace reporter Terry C to the scene and she reported last night via phone that the penis was in tack and fully erect.
Apparently the other day it was the victim of too much rum.
It only gets better and better.
It may come down to
You see, I am a conservative but I am registered unaffiliated so I can vote in any primary. So treat me nice ya’ll. Let’s see, a black fellow or a white lady? Who’s going to promise me the most of your money?
Costco and Sam’s Club announced yesterday that they will limit the amount of rice you can purchase reacting to record worldwide grain prices. You see we are burning our food now to make ethanol.
Lastly Vespa , makers of classic Italian motorscooters are showing record sales in
Are we reduced to a third world country?
Somebody shake me and wake me up!
The past few days I have taken to banging my big head on stuff. It hurts too.
This morning I stuck my head under a tarp covering the Jeep to grab my sunglasses and banged my head on the mirror. Yesterday I bashed my head by accident on the truck while I was cleaning it.
Last winter I had a head banging spell so bad that I cut it several times. That was when I was putting the lift on the Jeep. I came out from under the Jeep with a bloody head.
I must think my eyes are on slender stalks like a bug and not embedded in this big head.
I just got a wrong message on my cell phone from Unilever Corporate chewing me out for some expense that was incurred in training a group on the west coast. Next time I need to submit a voucher or something.
I don’t work for Unilever.
Poor guy, he’s going to get in even more trouble for ignoring this message. I listened to the whole thing.
I got bit by a spider a few nights ago. Twice the little shit bit me. Once he bit me on my waste where my underwear waste band is, and another on my right upper thigh.
It itches like crazy and it is swollen. Gigi found the little shit a day later in the bed and killed it.
I booked my flight to
I thought about going cheaper and flying down on miles the night before for free, sleeping on a park bench beside Richard or Peter’s sofa, then pick Gigi up at the airport the following day. She would have nothing to do with that. Then she fessed up that she would automatically miss the 6 AM flight if I wasn’t here bitching at her at 4 AM.
I can’t wait to get down there again and see the island and friends.
I’ll bet Peter’s “girlfriend” will be in
We’ll be traveling with two new converts so I get to show them around.
No, I didn’t figure out what is wrong yet. It must be the contacts in the switch or something amiss in the wiring harness. For sure it has new relays.
Anyway, it got me thinking about quaint stuff from the past.
One such instance is I actually got a telegram in 1979 when I got married. Hell telegrams were out of style then.
Remember, this was before faxes and email. Long distance telephone was still metered by the minute.
I can’t remember how it was delivered to me but it was delivered personally. It was a Saturday in November and someone put a telegram in my hand congratulating me on getting married, and it wished me good fortunes. My childhood pastor sent it to me.
It was kind of yellow in color and had type face like an old teletype. I guess that is how it was sent, by teletype.
I still have that telegram somewhere I think.
Now that gets me thinking about teletypes. They were so cool.
I used to hang out at a radio station sometimes and watch the teletypes pound out news from the Associated Press. Literally they were mechanical typewriters on the receiving end typing the latest news, sports, and weather. They would type reams of paper and it piled up on the floor in a continuous roll.
The news guy, heck the only guy at the station would run out to the machines mountain of paper while a song was playing and sort the news for the top of the hour news update.
The machine continued to pound out news…click, click, click. It typed forward and backwards which I thought was too cool.
I’m back from the beach, oh glorious beach. The weather was perfect.
I decided to take the Jeep down to the beach for several reasons. Mainly the diesel burning truck is still hooked up to the RV from last Monday, but secondly, I have never taken the Jeep on a long trip of four hours away from home.
Lastly, diesel has spiked here at as high as $4.39 a gallon. I figured I would rather burn gasoline at $3.33 a gallon because they both get about the same mileage.
Really, the main reason I took the Jeep is the Jeep is looking bitchen’ all shiny and red with the trim work on. I wanted to see if it would turn some heads and it did. I saw people staring at my hard work and it made me proud.
The Jeep has a 10 gallon tank and has a variable MPG of anywhere from 16 to 19 MPG. It also has an inaccurate gas gauge. So after 120 miles tops I start looking for gas. I have run out of gas in this Jeep three times for guessing the wrong mileage.
I felt like I was in a fighter jet and needed a fueling tanker following me. Down in the eastern part of NC gets mighty scarce of anything civilized like gas stations.
The gas cap handle broke in my hand from sheer fatigue after about my 6th fill up in two days.
On my second fill up about 150 miles from home I noticed a slight hissing under the hood. I looked and saw a tiny pinhole leak at the top of the radiator. I decided to push on since the leak was so small.
Finally the turn signals stopped working this morning. I used hand signals all the way back. I almost forgot about hand signals…how quaint.
Other than all of that, the Jeep made it just fine. I was no more fatigued that usual although the noise gets annoying after 4 hours.
Today I went by
I checked the fuse behind the relay and it is okay. Any ideas on what may be wrong with my turn signal smart people?
I got roasted at the Masters. Yes, I know better. My big old head, forehead especially got cooked in the sun.
Now I have flakes of skin raining down from my nose and forehead. Gross!
I am so excited by the blank slate in front of me. Summer fun waits.
It appears it will unfold as follows:
We head to Hilton Head May first for a wedding and R and R in the RV.
Then we tow the RV to
We are planning a return to
Late June we head to Jekyll for a real vacation and 10 days at my second favorite island.
We wind down to the fall at
Notice a beach theme here? I can’t wait.
Tomorrow I head to the beach including Ocean Isle, NC, Lockwood Folly, NC, and North Myrtle Beach, SC to visit clients.
We are back from our trip to the Masters at the Augusta National Golf Club in Gigi and I pulled into out lake front lot late on Friday. The lake level was very low so actually visiting the water was a 150 yard walk. Still the lake was beautiful.
All the other sites were teaming with rednecks happily doing loud redneck stuff. One neighbor looked just like Charles Manson. Gigi told me to be nice and just act like a good neighbor.
One fellow drove up in a golf cart with his dog when I started to drive my RV into the slot. He sat there, mouth open, taking in the oxygen needed to keep his redneck ass alive. He watched every move I made. I was getting annoyed, Gigi said be nice.
Finally I finished parking and got out of the truck to check out the location. The nice neighborly redneck spoke, “You know, your outboard motor drug on the pavement from the center of the road until you finished parking.”
I’m thinking,”What, and you just watched it and didn’t tell me?”
I looked at the motor and sure enough I had scraped off maybe ½ of the prop guard. Thank you mister redneck for the heads up.
Saturday at the masters was a wash out. Gigi and I arrived late morning. Parking was easy, everyone was friendly and there was a light rain falling. Within an hour the play was stopped, the rain poured down and you could hear thunder nearby. We were soaked and decided to leave for the day.
The beauty and attention to detail at the Augusta Golf Club is almost indescribable.
Walking in you are subject to airport like but friendly and respectful security. Nothing gets in that is prohibited, especially cells phones, cameras etc. Folding chairs must be a certain type.
Once you walk into the grounds its like on the Wizard of Oz when it turned from black and white to color. Everything is beautiful. You are hurried to a large courtyard to clear the entry where there are concession buildings, huge bathrooms and souvenir shops. This was one of many entry places and intersections were patrons could refresh and decide a plan of attack.
All the buildings were spotless, painted Master’s Green and very well maintained and had more than adequate polite staff.
As you left this area you walk down paved stone or brick trails surrounded by huge pine trees, blooming azaleas, and humongous magnolia trees. There is no exposed dirt anywhere. All the beds are mulches to perfection. There are acres of beds.
The walkways are clean. No debris, no trash, nothing, just a canopy of beauty.
As I approached the golf course I found that I kept raising my sunglasses to see if the colors and perfection were tainted by my glasses. No, what I was seeing wasn’t artificial turf. It was grass at perfection.
Honestly, I got emotional twice the first day. I have such respect for the game of golf and the history behind this place.
More later, I need to catch up on my regular blog reads.
I hooked up the camper last night. We’ll pack some clothes and food and be on our way by midday. It’s about a three and a half hour drive to I am about as excited about the thoughts of camping as I am going to the Masters.
You see, poor me hasn’t had a vacation since I was in
Bring on the R and R.
Let me say something here before I head out for the afternoon.
At lunch I ate downstairs at a restaurant in the lobby. It is a nice little American fare menu run by an old Greek man named Gus.
Today is pork chop day. I got the pork chops, new potatoes, and a salad.
I went to put black pepper on my salad and potatoes and out comes this fine mist of pepper. After great effort I was able to visually see some pepper on my blue cheese dressing.
People make way too big a deal about pepper. Put the damn pepper in a shaker with some holes big enough for the pepper to come out. Use the salt shaker as an example.
And please don’t over fill the shaker. One needs the pepper to move in the container for the pepper to fall out. If you pack pepper in tightly, then that is where it will stay.
It’s simple.
Now outlaw that finely ground up crap. Half of that stuff blows away before it hits the plate.
I don’t know how many times I have unscrewed the cap, poured pepper in my palm, pinched it, and sprinkled on my food with my pinching fingers, but I’m damn tired of doing it.
Okay, got it? Make pepper that you can actually dispense.
I took off yesterday afternoon to cut the grass and wash the behemoth RV. The weather was nice in the afternoon.
NOTE TO LOCAL WATER POLICE: I am on a water well, it is my well, my property, my water and I maintain the well without the use of any local, state, or federal money. If the well goes dry it is my problem. I will not be expecting any assistance or bailout from any government agency.
By 6:30 PM my chores were done. The RV is white again from removing winter dirt and spring pollen (damn trees are having sex everywhere).
I swear I feel like I am deicing a passenger jet when I crawl over that beast.
Today I am a bit sore and stiff from washing the RV, but I’m looking ever so forward to the opening ceremony of The Masters this morning, so I’ll suck up and work through the pain.
Saturday morning I will be there at The Masters. Gigi and I, the dogs and the parrot will head down to
So I’ll tie a few loose ends at the office today and finish packing and hooking up the RV this afternoon.
This is the view from my desk. Gigi picked the wall color and I love it. My sister painted the three pictures, Full Moon Beach Bar (St. Croix) on the right, the Lutheran Church (St Croix), and a view from a porch at Cherry Grove Beach, SC on the left.
Looking from the front of my desk. There are pictures of my dogs, Carolina Panther stuff from the year they went to the Super Bowl, Appalachian State SI cover when we beat Michigan, my love of shrimp, etc.
This is to the left of my desk. Again two more paintings from my sister of Peaches as a puppy and as an adult. On the table is part of the floor from the old Woolen Gym at UNC. To the right is a tiny shrimp named Bobby Edwards. He is maybe 8 years old and lives in that little sphere.
To the right looking out the window. This used to be Eastern Airline Reservation center. Gigi worked there for 13 years. They went out of business way back with Pan Am and TWA. They are supposed to build some residential and retail buildings there.
Finally, my cozy seating area in front of the desk. That is where I sit for Presidential looking photo ops. So far the press has not come by but I am ready. There is a deck of cards in that drawer. The tin fish is sitting on an empty box from some Cuban Cigars. I don't smoke , but having an empty Cuban Cigar box makes me feel worldly and naughty all at once.
At 11:00 AM this morning I got this overwhelming pain in my back followed by a sweaty nausea feeling. Oh great, my right kidney is passing another stone.
Usually this hits me in the summer when I get dehydrated.
The pain stopped after 20 minutes and came back twice this afternoon.
I’m going to The Masters regardless, even if I have to crawl.
At lunch I was waiting for a friend that was at the ATM when I saw this elderly fellow trip and fall backwards. I would guess he was well into his 80’s.
He did a good job rolling to absorb his fall, but there he was on his back.
I jumped from my truck to assist and suddenly he was surrounded by 6 people helping him up and asking him if he was okay. He was okay, just embarrassed.
You think sometimes that no one notices you. In this case at least six people saw him fall and six people were at his side in less than 10 seconds to help.
Sometimes strangers surprise you with their kindness.
Damn it I am sick of cold cloudy weather while spring unfolds before me. The trees are foliating, the azaleas are blooming, and the grass is green.
I’ve been a good sport but my patience has run out. Come on sweet summer.
This morning I got an email from Kim down on the island and she is sending me a tee shirt her friend makes that says, “Born Again Cruzan”. How nice.
Yesterday I got about 2 plus more hours on the water and as much experience with my boat.
The reason I am taking theses trip are to work out the kinks, become familiar with the boat, have fun, and to practice docking, loading and unloading, etc. I want to become as familiar as possible with my boat and boating so I can enjoy the summer safely.
The weather didn’t cooperate at all. It was supposed to be in the upper 60’s with a light breeze. It never got out of the 50’s and there was a moderate breeze with white caps forming late in the afternoon.
It took me a while to get the motor started this time. For some reason I had to pump a lot more fuel in the motor but then it fired right up.
We stayed by the shore line and eyed a land mark so we could figure out how to get home. (Note to self, pack some binoculars in the waterproof bag)
Not far back in a deserted cove we saw a really cute otter floating on his back eating a fish or clam. There we dozens of mallard ducks congregating in the still water.
Back in the main channel literally hundreds of sea gulls came by to see if we would offer them any food. Not a chance.
My mother in law was once feeding sea gulls and talking when a seagull shitted precisely in her mouth. Oh sweet justice! I now avoid feeding gulls.
Overall it was a nice afternoon. As usual we attracted crowds wherever we went. Some called my boat a bath tub with a motor, another called it a milk jug with a motor, but the best I have heard was my boat was the liquorcycle of boats.
There is a new independent pizza restaurant in
I ordered a pizza a few months ago and I dare say, of all the countless yards of pizza I have eaten in my life, this pizza from Crossroads ranked in the top five.
Just to continue my culinary research I ordered another Pizza a few weeks later and I think it may have been slightly better than the first.
For the third pizza I decided to drive down myself to see what was going on. I walked into an old converted house and up to a window that separated me from an institutional looking kitchen. The owner and his mother were there, she was folding pizza boxes.
I ordered my pizza and watched him make this pizza with unusual care. Everything was evenly distributed on the crust and sauce. All the ingredients looked fresh.
He baked the pizza and we chatted. Then he removed the pizza from the oven and …get this, he brushed the crust lightly with melted butter. Oh my soul!
No damn wonder! This guy is a genius! Another good use for butter is found!
Give this a try on your own pizza, you pizza crust haters of the world.
I was building a trip down to STX for next winter. I have 70,000 miles of US Airway credit.
Not to be discouraged I have come up with a great plan.
I’ll originate out of
So all I need now is some forged documents and a couple of latex masks like on James Bond movies that look like Michael and Terry.
Then we can board out of
I might flip off a few people as I leave town to get Michael in trouble.
I don’t know, this sounds like a lot of trouble plus I could do some hard time in the poky if caught. Just an idea, Gigi doesn’t think it’s a good one.
The second voyage of Origami II is slated for this morning.
Since the last trip I have purchased an anchor (very cool little spiked doohickey that folds up), some needed seat cushions to combat baboon ass, some braded rope (I learned twisted rope sucks), and various stainless doodads that attach to the transom so I can tie off stuff like anchors, motors etc. I love stainless steel boat stuff.
A friend of mine Thomas Thomas (yes, his real name) is meeting me here at noon and we’ll take the Jeep with the boat to
All of our rivers and some banks like Wachovia are named after ancient Native American tribes. I doubt anyone took the Pee-Dees serious with a name like that.
I always explain to Duke that when he waters the bushes, his tee tee flows to our creek, to the
I think Duke’s pee pee actually converges south of where we’ll be today so I’m not worried about contamination.
Anyway, I’m excited. Gigi is meeting a friend for girl stuff while the men swab the deck and continue with the motor break-in period.
Once a week or so I get a McDonalds Egg McMuffin on the way to work. I like Egg McMuffins. They are a nice shot of protein with minimal grease and calories. There is only one McDonalds that I pass on the way to work and it is in a very dangerous part of town at
Two shooting were in the parking lot of the McDonalds I visit weekly.
There have been countless robberies and assaults in this area so basically I would declare this area lawless.
But a good Egg McMuffin is hard to come by so weekly I take out my .38 revolver to cover myself (I’m not kidding) and go to the drive thru for my breakfast.
Just a side note: When I travel to
Anyway, what I find funny is when I leave the McDonalds there is a “no turn on red” sign at the light that everyone obeys. Yes, in the lawless area everyone obeys a written law.
Maybe they should post other signs, “Do not shoot humans in the parking lot”.
President Kennedy winds up to throw out the first pitch to inaugurate the 1962 American League baseball season and DC Stadium in Washington in this April 9, 1962 file photo.I love old photos. Look at this moment caught in time. You couldn’t have painted anything with more action and expression than this old black and white photo.
I start thinking that most of these adults are dead or nearly dead.
Look at the little boy with the camera. He’s probably still around. I was about his age when this photo was taken. Maybe I was younger but I ain’t dead yet.
Here’s to simpler times before the Internet when a photo on the cover of Life Magazine made you stare.
I am below average height for a man. I have always been 5’6½” inches tall but claim on the roster to be 5’7”.
I didn’t know I was short until I went off to college and saw all these giant guys walking around. Everywhere I looked there were these giant, pizza eating oafs.
My nephew is one of them. I’m not sure where he got the giant genes.
Being short never made any difference to me except one time I asked a woman out on a date and she said she only dated tall guys. Oh well, it was her loss.
Just two weeks ago my sister in law challenged my 5’7” claim. I stretched and strained and yep, 5’6 ½” like always.
But lately I have been feeling very short, shorter than usual.
I hope no one tries to toss me.
For some unexplained reason I do not have my regular wonder lust. Don’t get me wrong, I want to travel and see new things but I have this feeling of wanting to stay close to home.
I canceled a planned trip a few weeks ago to
I don’t plan to attend conference in
I have a voucher at American Airlines for $400 that will expire soon if I don’t book anything and I don’t feel motivated to book anything.
Most of my fun/adventure wonder lust surrounds the RV, the Jeep and the new boat. I have ignored some of the fun things to do just hours from my home, so I plan to take advantage of the sites nearby this summer…if it will ever get warm.
